THE YEAR'S BEST [ACTUAL!] HEADLINES OF 2000-2001 WERE

* Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

* Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

* Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

* Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

* Prostitutes Appeal to Pope

* Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

* Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

* Miners Refuse to Work after Death

* Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

* War Dims Hope for Peace

* If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May last awhile

* Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

* Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

* Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

* Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

* Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge

* New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

* Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

* Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

* Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy

* Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

* Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors